Recovering after a relationship

       I believe this is in the top three in most disheartening points in anyone's lives. There are many reasons why a relationship may end but in the end, love dissipated on one or both ends. I can't name every reason why it happened but I can help with coping in the lost of a partner.
      First thing is never let the other person out of your life.
I mean it may be hard because you might love them still but there are ways around it. You don't want the other person knowing you were just part of a relationship not a friend. He/She may talk trash about you or just lose respect for you in general and that's the last thing you want. You don't have to make conversation with them right away but eventually you should. Start slowly with a casual hello and how are you. Build up to maybe getting a group of friends and just going out for dinner. You never know it, it may work out for you in the end.
     Next, you should talk to someone how you feel and what you think of the situation. Humans tend to turn negative when they coup up thoughts in their head. So talk to a family member or a friend. It may not solve the issue at hand but it lessens the feeling of despair. They might be able to give you advice on their past experiences. I always felt better hearing from someone they went through the same thing as me. It gave me the feeling my experience was common and normal rather than knowing I am alone in the world.
      Do something you enjoy. I don't mean go on a major shopping spree or eat your pain away. But do something along the lines of having fun. Like a road trip with some friends or paint something. Convert that energy you put into a relationship into something positive. Treat yourself to a great day of fun and excitement.
      Don't seek out revenge. It may be tempting and may seem like the best way to make you feel better but don't do it. Causing pain to someone else is NEVER right. Just accept the outcome and move on. It's an old children's phrase, "Don't do something to someone if you won't like it back." Hey if toddlers can hold by this standard why can't we?
      This is very cliche but make a pros and cons list. Write out all the positives and negatives of the relationship and your former partner. You may find one side to be lop-sided but that's okay. Over time, some of those things will transgress to the other side. At the very least you tried to get some thoughts our of your head and onto a piece of paper.
       Dont start dating right away. Your emotions and heart will be making decisions over your brain. You might do something regrettable. You might hook up with a random person or someone you never had intentions of being with. Your decision-making becomes diluted and bilinded. You might as well be drunk and have no control of your body. That's why don't start dating again and don't think about going out to a party alone. The last thing is you want to wake-up pregnant(or a father) or be infected with a STD.
       If you follow these five steps, you will have no problem recovering and getting back on your feet. The time you may need to bounce back varies from person to person. So take some time to clear your mind and rethink what you what in your life. Sometimes a change of scenary or routine helps and that's what I did for my last breakup.
       I dated this girl named Dana for about eight great months. Suddenly our of the blue, she broke up with me. Immediately, I became wreckless in my behavior. I started running every day with fire. I turned away friends and spend many nights alone. I became ashemed of myself and wondered what I did wrong. For some unknown reason, I changed my entire wake-up pattern and how I approached people. This change made me a different person and allowed me to walk away from my relationship with my head held high. I used to wake-up every morning and just brush my teeth then I was out of the house. Now, I take a short run, take a full shower, groom myself, eat breakfast with my parents, read the morning news and then I am finally out the door. I also try to be more optimistic with others and try to joke around. These changes helped me forget about my past while helping me move on literally and metaphorically. The time it took for me to move on was about two months. Some people may have longer or shorter recovery periods but as long you know you are fine and have no intentions of going back to your depressed self then who cares about the time length.
       After a relationship, know you are vulnerable and might go cold turkey on human contact but you can ease the pain with some simple steps. Fill the empty space in your heart by facing the world and keeping your chin high. I think the best thing to know in the end is... "There's someone out there for everyone, just finding them is the true challenge."